Into the Obscuradrome 5/22/26
Welcome back to the Obscuradrome. I'm Bob Pastorella, co-host of the This Is Horror podcast, author of The Small Hours, co-author of They're Watching with Michael David Wilson, and Mojo Rising, which is out of print as of this writing. This is my newsletter, housed now at my website powered by Ghost.
The Bliss of Cutting It All Loose
Over the past couple of months my writing has been not very good. Too many false starts, too many storylines that pffft like a fart in the wind, primarily because I got all hot and bothered about a killer idea, listened to some really eager characters in my mind, and started head first without a shred of story to support the idea. And hey ... sometimes that shit just fucking works ... right? There's a lot I can say about momentum and trajectory and plain old gumption that occasionally makes a story flow like butter melting on a hot biscuit. Hell, Mojo Rising and The Small Hours were both written that way.
The Killjoys Were Here was also written like that.
I LOVE it when a plan comes together like that. The words are flowing and you lose yourself in the story, the atmosphere, the characters ... all of it. It's like you've captured lightning in a bottle and you've suddenly become Doctor Detroit going up to strangers saying, "nothing can stop me now!"
Um ... you get the idea.
I've managed to capture lightning in a bottle a few times now, but there's no way I'm going to catch it if I'm constantly looking for those thunder clouds. Those lightning captures are actually far and few between, and can be chalked up to right place, right time, optimal conditions for my mind, body, and soul.
If you do try to force it, the words don't hit the page right. Perspectives get out of whack so you begin to second guess yourself, trying the story on different characters. You try to begin the story earlier in the timeline, or go for broke and start at the last possible point before realizing you have a ton of backstory to catch readers up to speed. Your notes/bullet points/outline make it all sound so fucking easy, but the words aren't hitting the way you thought they would. Frustration raises its ugly head but you push those failing thoughts away, determined more than ever to fit that goddamned square peg in the round hole.
For me, when this happens, the guilt trip kicks in. This is from years of traumatic bullshit dealing with past failures. I've never been one to take things easy on myself, especially when I'm convinced I can do something and really extra especially when I haven't laid out the groundwork and decided to forge on ahead anyway.
This is typically what happens to me when I encounter anything that has "Assembly required" on the box.
Instructions/directions? Who needs 'em.
Well, for starters, I do.
But instructions are for finite things, things have a beginning and end typically. The book case needs to be assembled. You follow the instructions and then it is assembled. Beginning, and end.
Fiction also has a beginning and end to the story, but there's not really an instruction manual for each piece you write. Sure, you can plot/outline, and there's a sliding scale of exactly how involved you want to be with that process, but it's still not writing the damn story. If I outline, it's minimal. The barest of bones. Any more than that and I feel like I've already written the story. Some writers can outline so deeply that they do have an instruction manual for their story, and that's fine. For me, writing is so personal, so subjective, that to render it down to bullet points stifles the creative juices.
Did I just type juices?
Well, yes ... and I need that part of the story to stay moist.
Did I just type moist?
You get the idea.
I'm stubborn like that. I will always open the box of the thing that requires assembly and try to put it together without the instructions. Why? Because I've actually had success with that method. Not always, but enough times to try it again. Stubborn, remember? And when it doesn't work, then it's time to refer to the instructions.
When it comes to writing, I've had success without outlining. While I know I should be outlining projects, those successes are enough to allow me to try to write a story without one every single time. And when I try and try and try and get nowhere with any story, in any configuration, then it's time to step away and recharge the inspiration before I burn my battery out.
Take a break. Kick those guilty feelings to the fucking curb. If losing yourself in the words and story when it's working is zen, then kicking that shit to the curb when it's not working is bliss.
Relax.
It'll come to you when you least expect it. Let it build, let it rub against other ideas, let it mingle with inspiration and the things you love. Try another creative outlet, like drawing, painting, even playing music.
Don't sweat it. When the writing isn't working for you, embrace putting it on the back-burner for a while. Give yourself a hug and get out there and live a little.
Easier said than done, but something's got to give, and for me, stepping away allows me to reset and get restless again.
Try it.
My splatterpunk vampire novel debut, The Small Hours is out now. Southeast Texas Backyard Noir meets small town Urban Dread. It's funny, it's horny, and it's so, so bloody. Think Fright Night meets Suicide Kings and you're on the right track. A playful and gory spin on a vampire classic.
Get it at the Ghoulish website
If you've read it, please leave a review.
I was on Matthew Jackson's kickass podcast The Scares that Shaped Us talking about the book and also about the seminal vampire film Let's Scare Jessica to Death. You can listen to that episode here.
I was also a guest on my own podcast, This Is Horror, when co-host Michael David Wilson flipped the script on my and put me in the guest chair. You can listen to that episode here.
My most recent music deep dive was the Rolling Stones. Lately, it's been the Stones, Neil Young, and the Allman Brothers. Next up, Deep Purple.
Currently reading: Monumental by Adam Nevill and The Odyssey (Emily Watson translation).
I'm not currently watching anything, having finished season 2 of Dare Devil: Born Again, which was fantastic. Will probably get back on Dark Winds soon though.
That's it for now. Stay safe out there.
peace&love